Gran's House
by Kit
Chapter 10
By the time I got home, it was after eight o'clock, and assuming that my godparents had finished their evening meal, I phoned Aunt Anne.
"What are you doing on Saturday afternoon?" I asked, anticipating that I'd be able to give her a happy surprise.
"Geoffrey and I volunteered to run the book stall at the church jumble sale, so we'll be busy all day," she replied. "Why do you ask? Did you want help with something?"
"Oh," I said, feeling a little deflated that my planned surprise good news would fall flat. "Liam and Connor will be visiting the house, and I thought I'd bring them round to meet you."
"What? Oh, dear! Just a minute."
I heard her talking quietly with Uncle Geoffrey, but I couldn't make out most of the words, and after a few seconds, she spoke to me.
"We can't really get out of it," she said, "but you could bring the boys along to the jumble."
"I expect that they'll want to spend most of their time around the house, but I guess that it should be possible to fit in a visit to the jumble sale, maybe just before taking them back. Anyway, if for some reason we don't make it, I expect there'll be lots of other visits in future."
About forty minutes after that call ended, Uncle Geoffrey phoned me. I assumed that his wife had forgotten to mention something but was a little surprised that she hadn't called me herself.
"About last night," he said, "I'm sorry if anything I said upset you, but I thought I should be honest and up-front about such important matters. Personally, I don't think it's a good idea for a young, single person like yourself to take on the huge responsibility of caring for two children."
Based on what he'd said and on the timing of the call, I guessed that he'd waited until he was alone before he phoned me.
"They're not just any children," I protested. "They're my brothers, and they're your friends' grandchildren."
"Even so, if you go as far as adopting them, you'd be committed until they're adults, and for Liam that will be more than ten years from now. That means you'll be over thirty before you're free to get on with your life."
"You make it seem like a terrible burden. I'd like to live with my brothers, and it's not something that feels like a duty."
He sighed and paused for a couple of seconds before replying.
"If that's something that you really want to do, then you should explore all the options and think carefully before making any decisions. You should also get expert advice on the legal implications. I suggest that you consult with someone who specialises in family law, such as my colleague, Sandra Chalmers."
The following morning, I phoned Rose, but it went straight to voicemail. I left a message saying that I'd like to talk with her but also reassuring her that it wasn't anything urgent. She called me a little over an hour later.
"Hi, Paul," she said brightly. "Sorry I missed your call. I was in a meeting."
"Thanks for calling back. I just want to let you know that David and Sarah said that my brothers could visit me on Saturday."
"David told me that your first visit to their home went very well and that you were visiting again this weekend. As David and Sarah agreed to your brothers visiting you, I presume that second visit also went well."
"Yes, I thought so," I replied. "Anyway, David said that we'd need to check with you if the boys ever wanted an overnight stay sometime in the future. Of course, that would be after the end of term, so at least a month from now, but I know how busy you are and thought it best to leave as much time as possible for whatever checks you might need to do."
"That's good thinking, especially as this is made a little more complicated by the fact you live outside of my area. I'd have to coordinate with Linchester Social Services. Fortunately, I have some friends there, but even so, I don't know how long it'll take to make arrangements."
"Oh, right," I replied. "I hadn't thought about the fact that we're in different local authority areas."
"Are there any dates when you definitely won't be available for a visit?''
"Just the second Wednesday in July. It's my graduation ceremony."
"Yes, I think the last time we spoke you mentioned exams coming up. I presume they went well?"
"I got a First," I said proudly.
"Congratulations!" she replied. "Well, I must go, but I'll get back to you as soon as I can."
Bearing in mind what Uncle Geoffrey had said, it occurred to me that it might be a good idea to know something about the legal situation and possible options for the future. Also, it seemed better to do that sooner rather than later because I didn't want to appear to be totally ignorant when discussing the matter with Rose. Therefore, I phoned Uncle Geoffrey's law firm and managed to get an appointment with Sandra Chalmers for nine o'clock on Friday.
As soon as I arrived in the reception area, I was taken to Sandra's office, where I was greeted warmly. Having seen her previously at various social events organised by my godparents, I recognised her immediately. She was a short, slim woman in her late thirties, and her most distinguishing features were her mass of curly sandy-ginger hair and bright green eyes. On this occasion, she was wearing a pale green blouse with a dark green skirt.
This was the first time I'd been in her office, and I immediately noticed how different it was from my godfather's, which was much more formal. Her office was light and airy, and there were photos of her family all around. I guessed that while Uncle Geoffrey's office was designed to impress, Sandra's office was designed to make her clients feel at ease.
We sat on comfortable chairs on either side of a small coffee table, and I outlined the situation with my brothers and my wish for them eventually to live with me. Once her secretary had brought us tea and biscuits, Sandra asked me to go through everything in as much detail as possible. Although she occasionally asked specific questions, she made no comments until I finished.
"To summarise, then, you want your brothers to live with you and to be in your care," she said, "and you're prepared to take on all the responsibilities of a parent. Is that correct?"
"Yes," I agreed, nodding my head.
"As they are your brothers and already your next of kin, you could apply for guardianship as an alternative to adoption," she said thoughtfully. "However, the missing fathers are potential complications, so on balance, perhaps the preferred long-term goal should be adoption."
"But it's unlikely the fathers will ever turn up," I pointed out.
"It's best to consider all possibilities before making a plan of action," she said. "In any case, you should bear in mind that ultimately, the decision will be made by the Family Court, which will consider what is best for the children based on various reports, and it will also take into account the children's wishes."
"I believe my brothers want to live with me and that I could give them a good home," I said confidently.
"The fact that you're the only known blood relative and have already formed bonds with them is in your favour. However, the Court must decide that you are a suitable person and that you are capable of caring for the boys. So reports and recommendations from Social Services and others will carry great weight."
"They've already done background checks on me," I pointed out. "And from what I told you about Rose and what she's said to me, I'm sure you'll agree that she'll be on my side."
"In my experience, it's not usual for a relative to need background checks in order to spend time with children in care. However, as you were effectively a stranger to the boys, it's not really the usual situation. You mentioned that Rose referred to the process as speeding things up, so perhaps there is a longer-term agenda."
"Maybe she was considering the possibility that I might want to become my brothers' carer."
"Still, how you deal with Social Services is extremely important, and it's essential that your interactions with them do not become adversarial. Therefore, at this stage, it is probably better not to bring up the fact that you've consulted a lawyer, at least not until the formal process has started. Also, remember that both you and Social Services have the same goal, which is to do what is best for your brothers.
"You may not always agree with them on how best to reach the goal, but negotiating in a spirit of friendly cooperation will often lead to acceptable compromises. In my experience, if you treat them as partners and accept their help, then they'll be flexible. However, if you treat them as adversaries, then they'll become defensive, dig in, and refuse compromises. In the long term, it's a very bad idea to have enemies in Social Services."
"So far I've been getting on very well with Social Services and with the boys' foster carers."
"Okay, but there's something important that you should bear in mind. You think that Rose is sympathetic and may even be actively promoting the idea of you gaining custody of your brothers. However, it won't do your cause any good if you imply that to others. In any case, the opinions of one social worker would be just a small part of the total decision process."
"You make it all seem rather daunting," I said, feeling a little dispirited.
"Perhaps it is," she replied, "but it isn't as daunting as taking on the responsibility of caring for children. What you've experienced so far has been to determine if you might pose a risk to your brothers. The adoption process is designed to find out not only if you're able to provide for a child ' s physical and emotional needs but also if you have the strength and determination to get through the difficult times that will certainly be involved in raising a child."
"Okay, then, what do I need to do, and can you help?"
"There isn't much I can do until you make a final decision about what you want to do. If you wish to proceed with an adoption, my major role would be the final stage, which will be the application to the Family Court for an adoption order. The first stage will be that you need to contact an appropriate agency, and Rose should be able to help with that. Then you'll be assigned a social worker."
"Another social worker as well as Rose?" I asked.
"Rose is assigned to your brothers, and her job is to look after their welfare. The specialist adoption social worker will be assigned to you. They'll guide you through the process and gather information required for you to be assessed as a potential adopter."
"Presuming that goes well, how long would it take for me to adopt them?"
"Usually more than six months and possibly a year."
"What?!" I protested.
"The fact that they're your brothers and that you already know them may shorten the process, but all the different stages need to be completed successfully. That isn't just for your brothers' benefit but also for yours. Once the adoption is complete, it can't be reversed. The Court, and therefore Social Services, needs to be confident that you know what to expect and are willing and able to take on the responsibility.
"One of the reasons the process takes so long is to give you time to consider all the implications before taking the final decision. Therefore, there will be a training period that takes place, and information is gathered for the Potential Adopter Assessment Panel. Then if it's decided you're suitable, there will be a Matching Panel to make sure you and the child are compatible."
"But we're brothers, and we already know we want to be a family together."
"Not all brothers may be compatible," she replied with a wry smile, "and you've only known them for a relatively short time. However, it's possible that in your case the Matching Panel will be able to make their decision more quickly. Anyway, once that stage is complete, I can help you to make the formal application to the Family Court."
"If it's going to take so long, I guess I'd better get started," I said.
"I'd advise that you take more time and get to know your brothers better before you start the process. You really need to decide if you're doing it out of some noble sense of duty or whether it's something you really want to do. Also, taking more time will help to convince the Assessment Panel that you've given the matter serious consideration."
When I thanked her for her time and advice, she said that I was welcome, and with a smile she added that her secretary would be sending me an invoice. The meeting concluded with her telling me that I should contact her again when the Family Court might become involved or if there were any significant developments before then.
I arrived to collect my brothers a little before nine-thirty and found them ready and waiting. David returned my empty cake tins and asked if I wanted a cup of tea. However, the expressions on the boys' faces made it clear that they didn't want to wait around any longer, so I politely declined. I told David about the plan to meet up with my godparents at the jumble sale, and he raised no objections.
"I'm oldest, so I should sit in front, " Connor said as soon as I opened the driver's door.
"That's not fair! Just because you're older doesn't mean you get to pick the seat," his little brother protested strongly. "Tell him, Paul."
"One of you can ride in the front on the way there and the other on the way back," I said firmly. "If you can't agree on who sits in front first, then I'll decide. And it's not because I'm the oldest but because it's my car, and maybe I'll decide that you both sit in the back."
Whether or not they believed my not-so-veiled threat, they ignored it. Both wanted to be first to have the front seat, and after about thirty seconds of heated arguments, mostly related to their birth order, it became clear that they weren't going to compromise.
"Okay," I said decisively, "I'll toss a coin, and Liam will call heads or tails. If he calls correctly, he can choose whether to sit up front going or coming back."
Liam lost, and predictably, Connor chose to sit up front. We'd gone only a few hundred yards when the older boy, who'd remembered my previous week's description of the controls, started playing with the switches for his window and the sunroof. His younger brother complained that it was draughty and that he was getting cold, so I ordered Connor to close his window and choose a setting for the sunroof that was comfortable for Liam.
For the next few minutes, we were all quiet as the boys were looking out of the windows and apparently just enjoying the ride. I was just about to ask if they wanted me to put on some music when Liam started singing quietly, starting with 'My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean' and going on to 'Men of Harlech'. I waited until the second song had ended before I commented.
"Your teacher was right, Liam. You have a beautiful singing voice."
"You were listening?" he asked, sounding surprised. "I didn't think you'd be able to hear me."
"Yes, I could hear you, and it was lovely. I wish you'd sing louder."
For about a minute he remained quiet, and I was feeling guilty that I might have embarrassed him. Then Connor looked over his shoulder and spoke to his brother.
"It's okay, Liam, we like listening to you," he encouraged, "and no one is watching you."
A few seconds after that reassurance, the little boy began singing again, this time a little more loudly. He began with 'Scarborough Fair ' and 'Greensleeves' , then went on to others, and as far as I could tell, he knew all the words as well as the melodies.
During the drive, the clouds began to dissipate, and by the time we reached our destination, there was a lot of blue in the sky. When we pulled into the drive and got out of the car, the boys stood back and looked up at the house. Connor commented that it looked old, and Liam said that it was even bigger than he'd expected.
"So this is where Mum grew up?" Connor said quietly and with a hint of reverence.
I nodded 'yes' and opened the front door, requesting that they stay outside for a moment while I typed in the code to deactivate the alarm.
"David doesn't switch on the alarm until we're ready for bed," Connor observed.
"Yes, but their house isn't left empty for long times during the day," I pointed out.
By force of habit, as soon as we were inside, I took off my shoes and put on the slippers that were under the telephone table.
"Gran always insisted that we always wear slippers inside the house," I said in response to the boys' questioning looks.
"What about us?" Connor asked, looking at his own feet.
"That doesn't apply to visitors."
"We're family," he replied, apparently mildly offended. "She was our gran, too."
"Yes, you're family and also visiting," I pointed out.
"I want slippers," Liam said, pouting a little.
Within a few seconds of entering the house, it seemed that I'd inadvertently made both boys unhappy.
"Okay, I' ll get you some slippers for your next visit," I soothed, "but remember you mustn't wear them outside the house."
I asked if they wanted anything to eat or drink, but they were far too eager to explore.
"You know from the video where everything is," I said, "so feel free to explore wherever you like. I'll be around to answer any questions."
Predictably, Liam headed for the back of the house and the garden, and I followed him so that I could unlock the back door and the conservatory door. Connor asked if he could see the basement, and I told him the door was unlocked and that he could go wherever he wanted. On his way through the living room, the younger boy stopped.
"Is that a piano?" he asked, pointing to the old upright piano on the far side of the room. "I didn't see it in the video."
"Maybe it was only in view for a second or so, and it does tend to blend in with the other furniture," I said apologetically.
"Can you play it?"
"Sort of, but not very well. When I was about your age, I started taking lessons but gave up after a couple of years. Gran played very well."
He went to the piano, lifted the lid, and hit a few keys.
"Play something," he commanded.
"No one has played it since Gran died," I said. "It's probably out of tune."
"Please? Just a little bit?"
Unable to resist the pleading in his eyes, I pulled out the stool and sat down. The only thing that immediately came to mind was one of the first things I'd learned, ' Twinkle Twinkle Little Star', and I began to play that. Even with such a simple tune, I got some chords wrong, but he didn't seem to mind. He was still looking at the keyboard, so I played a few basic chords and cadences.
"Can you read music notes? Will you teach me?" he asked.
"Don't you do music at school? You sing so well, so I thought you had music lessons."
"No, they only teach proper stuff like that to older kids. I just listen to the tunes and sing them."
"Okay. I'll teach you what I can, but I'm not very good. If you're still interested after that, maybe we can get you a proper teacher."
Then, remembering the perfection of his singing, I thought I'd try something my teacher had done when selecting boys for our school choir.
"Liam, let's play a little game. I'll play a note just once and see if you can sing it."
"Okay, but then can I go in the garden?"
"Of course you can. In fact, you can go now if you want. You don't need to play the game if you don't want to."
"I'll play just for a minute, just to see if it's a fun game," he replied, probably just wanting to please me.
I tried a few notes, and he sang every one perfectly, even reproducing a note that I thought was out of tune on the piano. So I tried a few chords, asking if he could sing the highest note in the chord, and again he was perfect.
"Okay," I said, not wanting to test his patience, "let's go to the garden."
When Liam went out into the garden, I remembered his older brother and wondered where he might be. The basement wasn't very big, so I didn't think that he'd still be exploring there. However, that was the logical place to start, and that was where I found him, hitting the punchbag.
"Connor," I said, alarmed, "you shouldn't do that with bare fists; you'll damage your hands."
He stopped what he was doing and looked at me as if I were completely overreacting.
"I don't want you to get hurt," I explained, "and if I return damaged boys to David, he may not let you visit again."
"Where are the gloves?" he asked.
"I'm not sure I have any small enough for you, but maybe I can find some for your next visit. And I'll need to show you how to punch without hurting yourself." I said. Frowning, I added, "What are you so angry about that you feel like hitting something?"
"I'm not angry. I'm just excited and…" he trailed off while he thought of the correct words.
"You're full of energy, and you need to blow off steam?" I suggested.
"Yeah," he said, smiling and nodding his head.
"I used to feel like that sometimes, especially when I was a young teen. But I found there are other ways to burn off energy, like running and cycling. Anyway, I'm going to see what Liam's up to in the garden. You can come with me or keep exploring."
From his frown of indecision, it was clear that he was torn between the options, so I went back up the stairs and into the conservatory, where I kept the shoes I used for pottering around in the garden. By the time I'd put them on, Connor had appeared, and he followed me outside, where Liam was at the far end of the garden looking up into the fruit trees.
"Look," he said, managing to dance with delight while still pointing upward, "baby apples!"
It was great to see the little boy so happy, but I wondered how seeing a tree with unripe fruits could generate such excitement.
"When you come back in a couple of months, they'll be ready to pick and eat," I said. "Speaking of eating, have you two decided what you want for lunch today?"
"Fish 'n' chips!" Connor shouted enthusiastically.
"With mushy peas," his little brother added.
"Haven't you had fish and chips while you've been with David and Sarah?"
"Yes, but not the proper ones from a chippy," the older boy explained. " Mum got us that for special treats. "
That request hadn't been one that I'd been expecting, and I tried to remember if there was a chip shop nearby. Meanwhile, Liam was looking disapprovingly at the roses in the central flower bed, and Connor was apparently trying to open the combination lock on the shed where I stored my bike. I shouted out the combination and went to see what had displeased the younger boy.
"The garden's huge, but it looked nicer in Gran's pictures. There aren't as many plants now," he complained. "You need more flowers, and you should cut the dead flowers off the roses."
"I'm not very good at gardening," I pointed out apologetically, "but the gardeners come on two half days per week at this time of year."
"Uh!" he replied dismissively. "They prob'ly spend most of the time mowing the lawn. It's really big."
"There are two of them, and they have a big motor mower," I said defensively, "so I don't think they spend all their time on the lawn."
He gave me a look that indicated he thought I didn't know what I was talking about.
"Maybe I'll ask if they can add an extra half day," I added.
Having placated him somewhat, we both went to see why Connor was calling our names. He was still in the shed and was inspecting the contents in great detail. Much of one wall was covered in tools, and on the edges of the benchtop there were a couple of vices.
"I thought you said this was a bike shed," he said, "but look at all these tools and stuff."
"I thought I mentioned that it was also Grandad's workshop," I responded, "and there actually are two bikes in here. So it's also a bike shed. Anyway, it's not so much a workshop now because after Grandad died, all the power tools were moved down to the basement."
Feeling that I'd proved my point, I told them that we had almost two hours before lunch and asked if they wanted a drink or a snack. Connor said he did, and his little brother agreed but asked if he could go into the conservatory on the way. When we got into the conservatory, it was uncomfortably hot, so I flipped the switches that extended the blind s and opened some of the roof panes.
"It's too hot," Liam observed. "That's probably why Gran's flowers died."
"There's a temperature control, but it automatically opens and closes windows. That was a security risk when I was at uni and the house was empty all the time. Anyway, even with just a few plants, it's a nice place to sit and read, " I said, making a vague gesture toward the conservatory furniture.
"This is where you were with the Chinese lady in the photos. Was she your girlfriend?" Connor said, taking me by surprise and making me wonder if I should have selected which of Gran's photos to give to the boys.
"Em, yes," I replied.
"What's her name? Did you break up?" he asked, frowning slightly.
"Her name's Mai Li, and now she lives in another country, Singapore," I replied, wondering why he seemed so interested.
Liam, who'd been looking at the cacti and apparently not paying attention to what Connor and I had been saying, asked if he could have a snack now. I led the way to the kitchen, where I offered them a choice of drinks and snacks. As soon as I mentioned a selection of homemade fairy cakes, they chose that without waiting to hear any other options. Not wishing to spoil their lunch, I put out only one cake each.
Given the choice of tea, water or juices, they chose apple juice, and when I put the drinks on the table, they were delighted to see their names were on their glasses. I'd purchased those items online the previous week, along with mugs that also had their names.
"I got these for you as well," I said, showing them the mugs. "You can take these and the glasses home with you."
After our snack, they both said they needed to pee, so I reminded them where the downstairs toilet was located. Then I suggested that they might continue their explorations. I'd expected that they'd prefer the freedom to do it on their own, but they asked me to go round the house with them. The first place they wanted to see was where their mother had slept as a child.
Despite having seen the room in the video I'd made, the boys seemed disappointed when they saw their mother's former bedroom. They'd apparently thought that some of her things might still be in the drawers and cupboards. However, I told them that it had been used as a guest room for as long as I could remember, so any belongings that she'd left behind would have been moved out, and I had no idea what had happened to them.
In my old bedroom, they found the stuffed toys that I'd told them about. Liam was impressed with the size of Lump, saying that he, too, would probably have been scared of such a big toy when he was little. He also noticed that Pan the panda had lost some fur, and when Connor inspected it and saw the location of the bald spots, he rolled his eyes. However, maybe my guilty conscience caused me to misinterpret his expression.
Liam asked if I was going to move the toys to the master bedroom with the rest of my stuff.
"Well, I bags this room," he said when I told him that I wasn't.
""That's okay," the older boy responded smugly, "cos I bags Mum's room."
Clearly, they assumed that someday they would be staying overnight and that I had no say in the matter. After checking out the toilet and bathroom at the end of the hallway, we went into the master bedroom, where Liam went into the walk-in wardrobe and asked why I needed a whole room just for clothes. When I pointed out that it used to be for two people, he just said it was still too big just for clothes.
In the bathroom, the older boy asked why I needed a bath and a separate shower instead of a combined bath and shower like the other bathroom. Again I pointed out that it was intended for two people. After that, Connor lazily wandered round the room, touching things and smelling anything that might be scented, from deodorant to shower gels. Suddenly he stopped in his tracks.
"Why do you have controls on your toilet?" he asked.
"It's a bidet toilet," I said.
For some reason that triggered Liam to start chanting quietly in a sing-song voice, "Bee-Day, Bee-Day, Bee-Day."
"What's that?" Connor asked, ignoring his little brother.
"When you've used the toilet, you can wash your bum and then just use a little bit of toilet paper to dab it dry instead of using lots of paper to wipe it clean."
"Show me," Connor demanded.
By this time the younger boy had grown tired of his chanting and stood silently, watching as I lifted the toilet lid and showed them the nozzle and what the controls did.
As I described each of the controls, I demonstrated what they did. When I thought about it later, I realised that I'd probably gone into far too much detail, but the stunned looks of amazement on their faces just goaded me on. I assuaged any guilty feelings by telling myself that shocking and impressing little brothers must be one of the pleasures of all big brothers. In all my years as an only child, I'd never imagined that being a big brother could be so much fun.
"This knob controls the temperature of the water," I continued. "Turn it left for colder and right for warmer. Before using it on your bum, it's a good idea to run it and let it get to the right temperature. This lever alters the angle of the nozzle so you can get the water to just the right place. And this switch turns on a fan that extracts any nasty smells you make."
The boys just stood there studying me and the bidet for several seconds as if the object itself and my descriptions were the most fascinating things they'd ever seen and heard.
"Can I try it?" Connor, the first to emerge from the enchantment, asked excitedly.
"Me too!" his little brother burst out. "Can I? Please?"
"Yes, of course," I said, retreating back into the bedroom. I expected that Liam would accompany me out to give the older boy some privacy, but as soon as I left the bathroom, the door was closed behind me with both boys still inside. After several minutes of laughing, giggling and an occasional shriek, the bathroom door opened, and both boys emerged.
"That tickled!" the little boy said.
Connor remained silent. His face was very red, and he appeared to be a little confused.
"Did you wash your hands?" I asked.
"No," Liam admitted, "but we didn't do a pooh."
"Doesn't matter," I said. "Wash your hands anyway. We'll be going for lunch soon."
I joined them in the bathroom to wash my own hands, as well as to make sure they did as instructed. Before going downstairs, I showed them the office, and Connor, who at last had recovered his voice, observed that there was a computer there.
"That's two computers and a laptop," he said, referring to what he'd also see in my bedroom. "Why do you need all of them?"
"The laptop is for my personal stuff, the desktop in my room is what I used for my uni work, and the one here in the office is for house-related things like accounts," I explained.
"Which do you use for games?" he asked.
"Depends on what I feel like, but for a lot of games I use one of the consoles."
While they'd been trying out the bidet, I'd been online looking for nearby chip shops and found one that wasn't the nearest but had the best reviews. It took a little under ten minutes to drive there, and after going inside, we had to stand in a queue for a couple of minutes waiting to be served.
While we waited, I checked out the menu on the wall and noticed they didn't do small or child-size portions. Looking at the portions being served, I realised there was no way that either of my brothers could eat a regular portion. The menu also indicated that there was a choice of fish.
"Do you want cod or haddock?" I asked the boys.
"Mum just got us fish," Connor said.
"What do you want to drink with it? I'll be having tea," I said.
"Orange fizzy pop!" Liam replied instantly.
"Coke!" the older boy said, just a fraction of a second after his brother.
I ordered one portion of cod and chips and one portion of haddock, each with mushy peas, plus the requested fizzy drinks.
"That's a lot," Connor said as we left the shop. "Mum just got one fish for us all to share."
"You don't have to eat it all," I pointed out, "but at least this way you can try the two types of fish."
Back home, the boys insisted that we eat out of the paper wrappings, but in return I insisted on using cutlery instead of just fingers. I gave them some of each fish so that they could see which they preferred, and then they were appalled and almost horrified to see me remove the batter and discard it before I ate the fish.
When it came to fish and chips, that wasn't the only difference between me and my brothers. They doused their share with salt and vinegar, while I had mine liberally coated in tomato ketchup. I didn't like mushy peas, but they loved them, and I preferred the haddock while they preferred cod.
Immediately after we'd finished eating, the two boys indulged in a very loud belching contest, which induced extended fits of giggles in both of them.
"I hope you two are more civilised when you eat with Sarah and David," I said, giving them looks of disapproval.
"We can't do proper burps with them," Connor replied between giggles, "'cos they don't let us have fizzy pop except for birthdays and stuff."
"What, never?" I asked.
"Never," Liam said gleefully.
"So you tricked me?" I complained.
"No, we didn't. You asked what we wanted. You didn't ask what Sarah and David let us have," the older boy countered, yet again showing his potential skills as a lawyer.
"Okay, I suppose this is a special occasion, even though it's not a birthday," I conceded. "After all, it's your first visit here."
They nodded their heads in agreement, their broad smiles possibly caused by my mention of it being a first visit, with the obvious implication that there would be others.
"Now go and wash your hands," I commanded. "I don't want greasy fingerprints all over the house. And while you're in the bathroom, you can brush your teeth."
When they pointed out that they didn't bring their toothbrushes, I told them where they could find a selection of new ones in the bathroom. The boys continued their exploration of the downstairs parts of the house, and whereas Liam had first noticed the piano in the living room, the older boy's first comment in the room was about the size of the TV. I informed him it was new because I'd put the older, smaller TV into the parlour with the consoles.
Both of them decided that their next destination would be the parlour, where their initial interest was in the consoles and games. Then Liam commented on the large number of books, while the older boy's attention was caught by the trophies and medals that I'd received for sports and for chess during my time at school. There were also a few trophies that my grandparents had won for bridge and ballroom dancing.
"I would've put mine in my room," I said, feeling a mixture of pride and embarrassment, "but Grandad insisted that they should be here where visitors could see them."
Connor nodded his head as if he agreed, but I had no idea if he agreed with my desire to put them in my room or Grandad's insistence that they should be in public view. Before setting off to meet up with my godparents, I suggested that they might want to visit the bathroom. That prompted the older boy to ask why the 'bidet thing' was only in my bathroom.
"That's because Gran wanted it," I said, "and I'd never even tried one until I started using the master bedroom."
"But erm, it's a great idea, isn't it?" he asked a little hesitantly, blushing slightly.
"Yeah, I s'pose it does make you feel cleaner," I agreed. "It saves on toilet paper but uses more water."
"So why don't you put one in the other toilets?" he asked sheepishly.
"I never even thought about it. Maybe I'll consider it for upstairs."
When we arrived at the jumble sale, the slightly chubby grey-haired woman collecting entrance fees at the door was familiar. I thought she'd possibly been one of Gran's bridge friends, but I couldn't remember her name.
"Hello, Paul. Anne said you'd be coming, " she greeted me cheerfully. Turning her attention to the boys, she added, "And you must be Liam and Connor. You're every bit as adorable as she said."
The church members did a lot of charitable works, but they also thrived on gossip. Connor's clenched jaw and blushes indicated that he shared my feelings of irritation and embarrassment. On the other hand, Liam seemed to be more concerned about the large number of strangers in the hall. He'd started holding Connor's hand as soon as we approached the doorway, and now I felt his other hand grasping mine.
Aunt Anne must have been keeping her eye on the entrance because she started waving her arm to attract my attention to the book stall. Liam gripped my hand even more tightly as we made our way through the noisy crowd. My godfather, who was sitting behind the stall, nodded a greeting, and his wife, who was standing a couple of feet nearer to us, gave us a beaming smile.
"Hello, boys," she said directly to my brothers. "Oh my, you look even more handsome in person."
"Hi, Aunt Anne," I said.
Connor mumbled a 'Hello', and his little brother just smiled shyly. She waved to a casually dressed elderly man who was standing next to a young woman at an adjacent bric-a-brac stall. He smiled, nodded to her and came toward us.
"George, I'm sure you remember Paul, and these are Lily and Richard's other grandsons, Connor and Liam," she said. Addressing me, she added, "George has agreed to take charge of the books for a few minutes."
The man smiled and greeted us in a voice so quiet that I could hardly hear him over the hubbub in the hall. He then went and took Uncle Geoffrey's place behind the stall. Then my godparents led us to the far end of the hall, where there was a relatively quiet area which was being used to sell refreshments. There we managed to find an unoccupied table, though the boys had to share a chair.
She offered to buy us food and drink, but I pointed out that we'd had a substantial lunch and the boys' teatime was at five o'clock. So while my godparents had tea and cake, I just had tea, and my brothers just had a small ice cream each. Aunt Anne then proceeded to interrogate the boys on what they thought of my home and what we'd been doing all day.
Fortunately, the interrogation was more subtle and much more gentle than the techniques she usually used on me. Also, I think that my brothers were getting used to her personality, and they seemed quite relaxed when answering her questions. I was relieved that neither of the boys mentioned the bidet. Uncle Geoffrey didn't get much opportunity to say much, but he appeared to be enjoying listening to the conversation.
After about twenty-five minutes, the food and drink had been consumed, and Aunt Anne said that they should get back to the stall. She added that we might like to wander around the hall and see what was on all the other stalls but that we should make sure we went to see them before we left.
As it happened, there didn't appear to be much to interest the boys at the jumble sale, so it was only a few minutes later when we went to say farewell to my godparents. Aunt Anne insisted that my brothers should each choose a book from the stall, and she said that she would buy them as presents. Unsurprisingly, Liam chose a lavishly illustrated book about roses.
Connor chose a photo book of popular locations in the Lake District. It was the sort of thing that people refer to as a 'coffee table book' that looks nice and that people may occasionally skim through, but no one ever reads. At the time, I wondered if he was really interested in it or if it was just the only thing there that caught his attention.
Back home, I securely wrapped their glasses and mugs, putting them on top of their books in a bag. The boys flashed delighted smiles when I put the remaining twenty-one fairy cakes into a cardboard cake box and told them that they were for them to share with everyone in the foster home. I also handed them a big bag of fresh cherries. Then we got into the Merc, with Liam sitting up front.
As soon as we left my house, it seemed that a cloud of sadness began to fall upon us, and the boys became very quiet. Having enjoyed my time with them so much, I wasn't looking forward to saying goodbye to them, and it seemed to me that they probably felt the same way. In an attempt to raise our spirits, I began singing some of the mostly silly songs that had been popular on my school coach trips.
They quickly joined in with some of the songs, such as 'This Old Man' and 'If You're Happy and You Know It', and they listened attentively to silly songs such as 'On Top of Spaghetti', which they found very amusing. There was one song that set the boys giggling, especially the first and last verses as I remembered them.
As I went out walking with my brother Jim
Somebody threw a tomato at him
Now tomatoes are soft and they don ' t hurt the skin
This beggar did, it was still in the tin
…
I once saw a milkmaid a-milking a cow
The only thing wrong was she didn't know how
Along came the farmer and gave her the sack
So she turned the cow over and poured the milk back
Liam asked me to send him the words to all the songs so he could learn them and sing them with me on our next car trip. I was filled with a warm glow of pleasure by the thought that he was already looking forward to our next trip together.
Although our spirits had been raised during the drive, I began to feel a little sad as we parked outside the foster home. When we got inside the house, David came out of the kitchen to greet us, and the boys started to tell him about their adventures. However, they were both talking quickly and excitedly, and at the same time, so it was difficult to make sense of what they were saying.
"Boys!" David said and smiled indulgently. "Slow down. You have plenty of time to tell us everything later. Now come into the kitchen and say hello to Sarah."
We followed him into the kitchen, where Sarah was starting to prepare their meal. I handed the box of fairy cakes to David, who opened it and smiled when he saw the contents.
"I thought you might like to have these as treats for the children," I said.
"Oh," he said, looking at my brothers, "These are far too good for children. Sarah and I will have to keep them for ourselves."
Connor and Liam looked shocked and horrified, but before they could say anything, he laughed and spoke again.
"Just joking, boys. We can all have one each at teatime and the rest as treats in the next few days."
Connor rolled his eyes, took the glasses and mugs out of the bag he'd carried in, and put them on the counter. He unwrapped them and showed them to Sarah and David.
"See what Paul gave us. Can we use them at teatime?"
"Okay," David replied.
He was smiling at the boy, but I got the impression that he wasn't very happy with the idea.
"Are you staying for tea?" Sarah asked me.
"No, thanks," I replied. "There are a few things I need to do tonight."
Connor gave me a look of surprise and disappointment, and his little brother looked as if someone had slapped him. The expressions on their faces tempted me to change my mind, but I couldn't bring myself to sit through a meal and hide my sadness at having to leave my brothers.
"I'll call you later," I consoled them, "and I'll see you again next weekend."
I said goodbye to Sarah and David, and the boys followed me to the car. Connor gave me a brief hug and looked at me accusingly, as if he was being abandoned. Liam hugged me tightly and clung to me for so long that it seemed he was trying to prevent me from leaving. I picked him up, and he put his arms around my neck, burying his face in my shoulder.
"I know how you feel," I said gently. "It's hard to say goodbye when you love someone, but it's not for long. We can chat during the week, and I'll see you again next Saturday."
After a couple of minutes, his arms loosened a little, and when I felt that he was ready to let me go, I lowered him gently to the ground. He stepped away and went to hold hands with Connor. I got in the car, waved, and drove off. When I got home I went for a long run, and by the time the running had cleared my mind, I was feeling exhausted. After a brief and subdued call to my brothers, I had a shower, and, although it was still not even nine o'clock, I went to bed.
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